Though the thought of asserting oneself can pose a challenge to those who are naturally timid, doing so is a necessity if you want to get what you want in your relationship.If you feel that you are constantly being put-upon instead of getting your needs met, increasing your assertiveness is a wise choice.
If you don't possess a great deal of self-confidence, work on building it, reminding yourself what a wonderful person you are and remembering your positive characteristics so you don't feel as if you don't deserve a voice. Some individuals who lack the ability to be assertive say yes to almost anything, leading themselves to do things they otherwise wouldn't have agreed to do.
Don't embellish how you describe the person, because you risk appearing less credible.
Losing credibility can lead the other person to have a more catastrophic reaction, particularly if they realize that you are not being completely honest.
Although you might feel a sense of responsibility for the feelings of someone you've just let down, it's important that the other person is given an opportunity to speak.
According to the University of Illinois Counseling Center, you can encourage the recipient of your polite "no" to share their thoughts and feelings by asking simple questions such as "Is that clear?Maura Banar has been a professional writer since 2001 and is a psychotherapist.